A Never Ending Hole
by 39addict101
Summary: He was desperate, he was broken, and he was torn in two. He was falling, falling in a pit of despair, a never ending hole.


**Hello, fellow Holes fans! This is my FIRST EVER Holes fanfic, but I guess you knew that.**

 **Anyway, this was really fun to write, and I hope its as fun for you to read as it was fun for me write.**

 **Did that even make sense? Probably not, but I don't make a whole lot of sense either.**

 **Get used to it.**

 **That's who I am.**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

He was desperate, he was broken, and he was torn in two.

He was falling, falling in a pit of despair, a never ending hole.

His past was always there to haunt him, with everything he did. Never could he have a peaceful night.

When storms raged above him, he felt his troubles, they cracked inside him like thunder, and he saw flashbacks that flashed like lightning, and then were gone.

His life was not important.

But he didn't care, he had to keep living, to fix his past mistakes.

Squid was broken, torn, bruised and battered, and Camp Green Lake was there for him, supposedly.

* * *

His tears flowed down his cheeks like a waterfall, and the dark seemed to press in on all sides.

His muffled sobs seemed almost to comfort him.

"When?" He wondered. "When will the pain leave?"

There was no answer. He hadn't expected one. It wasn't as if Caveman would wake up, and be like, "Oh, I'm sorry, Squid, but the pain won't leave, not yet."

But then Caveman did wake up. "Squid?" He asked, the dark obscuring his face. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I just..." Squid paused, searching for the right words. "I'm fine."

Caveman fell back asleep almost immediately, but Squid stayed awake, the pain of his mom's death never leaving him.

* * *

Sunshine. A smile. Then darkness and confusion.

Squid remembered when his mom had broken the news to him. "I have AIDS." She said, softly. "I've had for over three years. But I never wanted to tell, because," She paused and wiped her soft blue eyes, "Because I love you too much. I couldn't stand hurting you."

Squid opened his mouth to say something, then he looked at his mother.

His mother had been his all. His dad had left them when he had been only seven. That also had haunted him, and he had blamed himself.

Ten year old Squid's nightmare had just begun.

He watched as his mother slowly weakened, the life ebbing from her frail and abused body.

Then, one day, he saw her take her last breath, and whisper a few last words into his ear.

Then his nightmare truly began.

He was tossed from one relative's home to another, until finally, his crabby aunt Bertha agreed that he could stay at her home, until he did something wrong.

Squid did not last long. The pain drove him, forced him, to commit a crime. His sentence? Camp Green Lake. Eighteen months.

* * *

The next morning, the whole camp seemed fresh, even though it wasn't.

If there was one thing Squid wanted, it was rain.

Perhaps rain could clear his mind, at least for a little bit. Then, maybe, he would sleep good, if not just for one night.

Caveman came up to Squid, a worried look on his face. His eyebrows were scrunched together, and his eyes were searching. "Are you ok?" He asked, his voice soft.

"What are you? My mother?" Squid snapped, the pain rushing back. His mother would have asked the same thing, she would have held the same worried look in her eyes.

Caveman stepped back, astonished. He didn't saw anything, and Squid didn't bother to try and start a conversation.

Camp Green Lake was _not_ the place for third grade get-to-know-each-other chats.

* * *

And so the merry-go-round continued. Squid whirled around on it, trying to hide his pain.

He joked, he laughed, and he poked fun at others, while all the while only trying to mask his own pain monster.

His life was never the same, however, when rain at last fell.

Camp Green Lake had been disbanded, and the boys had been sent home.

On the way back, on a hot, stuffy bus, with several other boys, thunder had crashed, causing almost everyone to jump.

No one had heard thunder for a long time. But when lightning flashed, and the first cool refreshing fat drops of rain began to fall, no one complained that the old bus leaked.

The water ran down Squid's face, and he cried, but they were tears of joy.

For his mother's last words had been, "When it rains, those are my tears, and I'm weeping because I can't be with you."

Alan loved the rain. He would cherish it, and he would drop everything just to go out and stand in the rain.

* * *

 **That is the worst thing I've ever written. I apologize, for forcing you all to have to read my junk.**

 **Please review, I LOVE constructive criticism.**

 **In fact, I love flames, because they're a review!**

 **So PLEASE review!**

 **Until Next time,**

 **-39addict101**


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